Words women use
1. Fine: This is the word women use to end an argument when they are right and you need to shut up2. Five Minutes: If she is getting dressed, this means half an hour. "Five Minutes" is only five minutes if you have just been given five more minutes to watch a game before helping around the house.3. Nothing: This is the calm before the storm. This means something and you should be on your toes. Arguments that begin with "Nothing" usually end in "Fine". (Refer back to #1 for the meaning of "Fine")4. Go Ahead: This is a dare, not permission. Don't do it!5. Loud Sigh: This is actually a word, but is a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men. A loud sigh means she thinks you are an idiot and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you about "Nothing". (Refer to #3 for the meaning of "Nothing")6. That's Okay: This is one of the most dangerous statements a women can make to a man. "That's Okay" means she wants to think long and hard before deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake.7. Thanks: A woman is thanking you -- do not question, or faint. Just say you're welcome.8. If you say so: Men, take note: this is a trick. This is THE statement that means the opposite of what it says. When a woman says, "If you say so," she actually means, "you're an idiot; I can't believe I ever married you, and you better realize how lucky you are every day of your miserable life." She will then issue forth a loud sigh (see #5), and assign you a task worthy of your limited intelligence (although you will NOT be given the "five minutes" as discussed in #2).9. Whatever: Is a woman's way of saying F@!k YOU!10. Don't worry about it, I got it: Another dangerous statement, meaning this is something that a woman has told a man to do several times, but is now doing it herself. This will later result in a man asking "what's wrong", for the woman's response to be "nothing" (refer back to #3 for the meaning of "Nothing").
Kisses XOXO Saturday, July 26, 2008
